Married at First Sight – I know I shouldn’t…

but I am!  Before I begin this post in earnest I need to confess. Before our daughter was born one thing my other half and I randomly discussed was our fervent desire that when she grows up she does not like reality tv. It would be the antithesis of us. TV, an invention that could have been the most powerful worldwide tool for education that is anything but. This I have to reconcile with my absolute besotted-ness with Married at First Sight. I have watched the entire current (S03) series twice, and watched Seasons 1 & 2.

Now this post comes with an upfront caveat. We were watching edited TV. We have to be really honest with ourselves – we were shown the stories the producers wanted us to see – no more no less. The public reaction to the subsequent news that the couples were no longer together, in particular Keller and Nicole, and the subsequent social media storm is both odd and not odd if we think about it.

I am a grown woman, have been in a loving partnership for 11 years, we have a gorgeous 4 year old daughter, and I am hooked on this couple; so hooked that I ended up on Instagram – how sad is that?! (No responses to that please!). I wanted them to be together. At the end of the day I do not think you ever know what really happens between two people, even your best friends. Why do we suspend that with these two? I have been pondering this, and I think it speaks to the fact that at the end of the day we are social creatures, who want to love and be loved in return. We see bits of ourselves, and bits of people we have known and are wishful for an outcome like ourselves or equally are wishful for the outcome that we didn’t get or didn’t pan out for our friends.

So pretending for a moment this is a TV show with characters not real people, my sincere apologies in advance to the real people here for what I am about to write. Not to be read as anything other than fiction, and bad fiction at that with tongue firmly in cheek. Here is my first possible ending to what we are seeing. The sweet but steely girl character, we will call her Nihcole, has now hooked up with the nefarious boy character known as Jhono. It is going as badly as some have suggested, she is reeling from being badly treated and he abandons her. She does not know where to turn, who to call, and in the moment the one person who springs to mind is the audacious yet deeply loyal Kheller. If only they were still connected on social media… fortunately this can be changed instantly and initial contact is made. He is around in a heart beat and we see them sailing off into the sunset.

Or my option two, where all that is transpiring on social media is still the show. They are actually together and the disintegration playing out on social media is all for TV, the postings staged, a big ruse to set season 4 off with an almighty bang – a one hour special where they have twins on the way (they have skipped a generation!), as clearly need to also do one better than Alex and Zoe if the next season is to be super-charged!

I know – how sad am I with both these options?! We all want the fairytale in one way or another, or at least me and many of those on social media. I think it says something about the human spirit, the human condition, a wistfulness for the magic and happy ever after. Though of course all of us in long standing relationships/marriages know only too well that the reality is ongoing work and effort, with days when we want to shoot the other person!

In ending thought I would share this from Simple Reminders, about people coming into and out of our lives, some staying, some going, and a reminder that a piece of them stays with us always. ♥ So wishing every one of us the ending that we each desire And for me personally a halt to my newly developed Instagram addiction! At the end of the day the only life you have to live is your own, most of us probably need to put more attention and effort into that.

craig keller nicole heir

Image courtesy of clipart.panda.com

The real joy of Nana

Trying to get day care in Melbourne is a little like a lottery, only the impact of not winning can have a larger outcome. We are currently waiting for an extra day to become available for our daughter at daycare – we are one day short per week. So her Dad has covered a couple of weeks, and then we put the call into Nana who lives over the Tasman sea. She was with us covering three days (as in one day a week for three weeks), as well as generally making life easier for us. And then we are back to Daddy daycare for that day.

Nana (and Pop – who stayed at home this time) are very accomodating. We only have two bedrooms, and so they stay on an airbed (double height I should mention) in our little girl’s room. Now we have been having trouble with the afore mentioned little girl – she keeps waking in the middle of the night and wanting to sleep in Mum and Dad’s bed. We have been trying to figure out if she is scared of the dark, cold, not feeling well, just doesn’t want to be by herself. We have been trying different tricks, lights, more/different blankets, if we were not so tired we would give her a cuddle and put her back to bed after 10 minutes. We know we have to get this figured out. And then along came Nana. For almost the entire time she was here, while our little girl would still wake in the night, she would hop herself into the air bed with Nana. So Mum and Dad have experienced almost three weeks of sleeping through the night. Oh what a feeling! Of course normal transmission has resumed, and we are back to square one. New tactics about to be trialled.

tired parents north melbourne

Image: www.huffingtonpost.com

Finally, a scarf for me

Well the change is not to take even longer between posts! Since making my last post’s bold statement it does feel like I have moved in entirely the opposite direction to what I am hoping to move in. Fortunately as they say, Rome wasn’t built in a day.

What I am really exited to share with you is the scarf I finished knitting for myself and have actually had a chance to wear once or twice (spring is inching its nose around the corner here). You may recall that I bought this divine wool more than a year ago. What was that about Rome?!

I have never put tassels on a scarf (or anything else for that matter). For the life of me I could not imagine how to do it and always envisaged it would be pretty tricky. It is so easy I am tempted to put tassels on everything I knit! If you have never undertaken the joy of tassels I can highly recommend these two sites, a wiki How and this page from Felt Magnet. Think it took me longer to find the instructions than follow them – did I say how easy it is to do tassels?!! The photos do not really do the scarf justice – this may have something to do with the completely cracked lens on my phone, fortunately just about to be replaced. It was a simple ribbed pattern that came with the ball of gorgeous merino mohair wool. The scarf is light and so cosy, the colours so rich. While it may have only got an outing or two this year I foresee many for next winter.

Change will be coming…

…to me that is, not this blog. It has been brewing for quite some time. And then you reach the point of action – take action or do nothing. What has galvanised me? A host of things of which some are possible future posts as I take the actual steps.

And how will I adhere to my overwhelming desire for change, knowing that change is not the easiest of things to fully go through with? I am going to endeavour to hang on to two things. On our last day in Fiji for breakfast just two days ago we were sat on table number 13 – 13 is my lucky number, I was born on a Friday the 13th! – and I took it as a symbol, a sign, a prompt from the universe (though of course one could also take it a sheer coincidence, but where it the joy in that!). And while I do not believe in horoscopes as we were waiting for pick up from the hotel to take us to the airport I read mine in the local newspaper. I have been thinking about what needs to change for a while, this is not holiday random thought, and it simply resonated with me, in particular the last line, “Make choices now or life will choose for you later”. This is about me taking back the reins of life and giving direction, not being led or simply wandering without thought.

horoscope scorpio

Stating the obvious

What did I learn on Friday…that I need some child, other half, and work free time on a regular basis. And also think that time should be during the week. Now I do not mean every week (though that might be nice…). It just hit home that I need to escape work and family and just be me, something that rarely makes it to the top of the ‘to do’ list. Probably have known this for a while but perhaps afraid to admit it aloud. Though have said a version of this before – the whole life is too crazy, rant of a working mum springs to mind. Friday was in hindsight a needed reinforcement. Life has got too crazy again, and an action plan is in the making.

In the interim here is evidence from Friday. I was heading home after an appointment to continue work rather than head to back to the office. Instead I actively waylaid myself at the shops, wandering here and there, stopped and ate a late lunch, and it was all fun! The photo does not clearly show it, but the black at the back is two items not one, a pair of trousers and a black jumper. If you are going to confess – have to ‘fess it all up!

How do you find me time amongst the madness of work and motherhood?

North Melbourne

Grimsby

Not really a post, but watched Grimsby last night, and have to recommend it. If you want a good belly laugh this could be the movie for you. It is of course risque, as is Sacha Baron Cohen’s style. However my approximately 70 year old mother-in-law was sitting next to me on the couch and was laughing just as hard.  What more can I say?

Photos courtesy of http://www.hoyts.com.au

Cafe Melbourne in Thames

I consider myself a small town girl in origin. Devonport was my first home, after the age of five I lived in a village in the UK, returning to NZ from the age of ten where Thames was home until I headed off to University.

I was recently back in my old home town of Thames, not having been there for three and a half years. In that time a new cafe has opened, Cafe Melbourne, supposedly bringing some Melbourne to Thames. Given I reside in Melbourne, and have done for 12 years, and have one of the best cafes in Melbourne on our proverbial doorstep (Auction Rooms), feel qualified to pass comment on whether Cafe Melbourne is bringing some Melbourne to Thames… And it does!

We were only in town for for 3 days, and went twice.  The coffee is GREAT, and the food DIVINE.  I laughingly joked (semi-seriously) this is good enough that can we come back on the weekend? (knowing we would be back in the real Melbourne). My other half said the food was of Auction Rooms quality – for those of you who have ever ventured to the Auction Rooms in North Melbourne, this is high praise indeed, even more so if you knew my other half!

And as an aside – the owner’s back story is on the back of the menu, worth the read so won’t spoil that surprise. And as it is with small towns, my Dad was a frequent purchaser from the owner’s father’s shop many years ago, so that random thread of connection.

Did not even think to take photos (or is that, was too lazy to take photos of my own…), here are some of theirs instead. If you ever pass through Thames visit – you will not be disappointed. Imagine any choice from the menu will delight, I highly recommend the chicken salad – it was to die for!

Cafe Melbourne Thames

Cafe Melbourne Thames

Photos courtesy of CafeMelbourne.co.nz